Wishes and Prayers

When Amanda was two months old, we came back to Texas to show her off. See?!? We finally did something good!! We stayed for a few days at Neil and Donna's, where they were getting Barry ready to go on a church skiing trip.

"How can you do that?" I asked Donna. "Put him on a bus to go away to God knows where (actually? Breckenridge) all by himself?"

"You just kiss 'em good-bye, and pray a lot," she answered. Good Lord, I thought, what a heartless, uncaring mother my sister-in-law has turned out to be.

Well...NO. Of course she wasn't. I've thought about that a LOT in these recent springtime days, beginning with the Enterprise tornado, through the...um-m-m...unpleasantness here in Lamar County , and now this week in Blacksburg. How CAN we do that, we parents? Just put our babies on a figurative or literal bus, to go away to God knows where, all by themselves?

How hard was it for me to say to James as I sent him off to dear old P-High, amid swirling rumors that hundreds of protesters waited to block entry to the parking lot, "Be aware. If you see trouble, you be the one to walk the other way, and take all your friends with you." When, what I really wanted to do? Was to say, "this is not your fight. Stay home. Watch Smallville all day. School will be there tomorrow. Or if not tomorrow, then another day."

How much, can you even begin to imagine, do the parents of the eight kids in Enterprise desperately wish for another day, another lifetime to say I love you. Have fun. Be careful. Do your best. See you this afternoon.

Or the parents of the thirty-two in Blacksburg.

THIRTY-TWO. Lord Jesus.

What do they wish for? My mind reels to think of it: A different school choice. A class at a different time of the day. Another weekend at home. One more argument. PLEASE. Just let me see him roll his eyes at me one more time. One more hug. One more chance to say, I am so proud of you. You take my breath away.

Randy is amused that I follow Amanda's car out to the street as she pulls away to go back to Tuscaloosa, and that I will watch until she turns the corner and the little crimson car disappears from view. He DOES understand, albeit in a good-natured, must be a mom thing kind of way, that I just need to see her for those last few seconds. One more glimpse. One more heartbeat.

You just kiss 'em good-bye, and pray a lot.

Keep 'em safe, Lord. And bring them - ALL OF THEM - safely home...

I Want...

...Elizabeth Edwards to be our First Lady. And if she goes ahead and brings John along, so much the better. There is much to admire there.

Please, Lord, take care of them both.

Who Says....

...you can't teach an old dog a new trick!



Here is Cinnamon and her new Carpeted Telescoping Ramp.



The coolest dogs always have all the latest equipment!


At her yearly checkup, we discovered that Cinnamon is suffering from severe hip dysplasia and osteoarthritis. I had noticed that her back legs were giving her problems, especially on stairs, and also just after waking up - trying to get up and move around is tough on her. Dr. White showed me her x-rays, and it was quite obvious even to me that her hips are badly deteriorated. We've started her on Rimadyl and glucosamine, and I think I've seen some improvement in her mobility, although I'm afraid I'm just trying to convince myself that she's getting better.

Cinnamon will be 13 this year. A ripe old age for any dog, but really quite old for a larger breed like she is. We are going to be dealing with quality of life/end of life issues with her soon, and my heart breaks to think of it. I'll notice Randy looking at her, and then he'll look at me, and I'll say, "Stop. Just don't even..." as if not saying it will keep it from happening. I tell Dr. White that she will live forever, and he always smiles gently and says "Cinnamon is such a good girl."

That she is.

And if a silly Carpeted Telescoping Ramp for the van will help us take her along for one more Spring Break trip to the beach, then she will go.

For as many more trips as our Good Girl has left in her.

A Lump in My Throat the Size of a Good Dog

So I'm eating my lunch today in the kitchen, watching Animal Planet, and this commercial comes on. The bite of salad on the fork in my hand never did get eaten, because I dropped it in my search for a Kleenex. I still can't watch this without getting choked up.

Buy Pedigree dog food.

Visit your local animal shelter. Today.

Busy As A Bee

It's good to have time to waste...

Ready or Not...

It's really starting to sink in that we're hurtling faster and faster into the empty nest. James got his acceptance letter to The University of Alabama, and Amanda got her transfer acceptance to The University of North Texas over the holidays, so it's happening.

Whether I'm ready for it or not.

Denise gave me a book for Christmas - Letting Them Go by Dave Veerman. I started reading it this morning, and I find myself saying "Yep - I know what he's talking about" when he talks about the feeling of grief when you realize just how your family structure will change. I was pretty melancholy over the holiday when I'd stop to think about everything that will happen before next Christmas rolls around again. It was bad enough when Amanda left, but now James, too?? I just can't imagine this house without a kid in it. Poor Cinnamon. She'll be the only one left for me to focus all my Mom-energy on.

I sent an email to my brothers: "While I don’t doubt that life with young adults instead of kids will be just as good – and, in many ways, probably better, it’s still going to be…different. It’s the New Normal, and we’ll get used to it soon enough and enjoy it, but right now I’m sad to see this part of our lives drawing to a close."

But, in many ways, I am ready for it. My kids are happy and healthy. They're turning into delightful people, and I do look forward to relating to them on more of a peer-ish level. While still being their MOTHER, of course. Like they'd ever get out of that. Please.

And then there's the reason the kids are here in the first place. Randy and I had a weekend together - just the two of us! - in Dallas just before Christmas that was so great, and I know that's going to continue. Shoot, I married him because he was fun to be around, and he's just gotten to be even more fun as time has gone by. Who in the world knows what the future will bring for the two of us? Driving Route 66? An RV?? A Mediterranean cruise??? More weekends at The Home Depot?!?

More to my brothers: "I have enjoyed the heck out of these years and these children. From the time they were born, at every age they have been, I have looked at them and said “this time of their lives is perfect. This is the BEST age.” And then time passes, and I think “No, THIS is the best age.” And I know that I will always think, no matter the time or the age or the place or the circumstance, that EACH age is the perfect one."

Even the grown-up age.

Perfect.

I've Been Everywhere....

Well, definitely not everywhere! I do see a definite southern-trending pattern in my US visits. I just wish these showed up as blue and not red states...


create your own visited states map

And I counted Hong Kong as part of China, even though it wasn't when I was there.


create your own visited countries map

Band: The Last Waltz

Here they are on the field in Mt. Pleasant at UIL marching contest for the last time.

First Division all the way around. Cheers to all involved. What a grand experience this band thing has been for all of us.

Even I Am Surprised

We have a signed, cash contract on 21st Street! Eight days on the market before the offer came in. Goodness - even I, The Usually Optimistic, am surprised by that.

Hopefully, a harbinger of Things to Come.

Clive? Lisa? Hallooo-o-o-o???

Them "Designed to Sell" folks got nuthin' on us! We just got finished Designing to Sell the house on 21st Street, and it is officially on the market. I'm pretty proud of what we did for very little money that has made a big difference in the house.

We painted the wainscoting in the dining area, tiled both bathrooms, changed out a ceiling fan, a light fixture, and - in a VERY bold move - got rid of the extremely maroon Texas A&M mural in the front bedroom. That mural was a mess. Apparently they used an oil-based paint to make it, because when I went to KILZ it, the paint started bubbling up, then just came off in these big, giant SHEETS of slime. It was one of the more bizarre things I've seen lately. Kinda like stripping wallpaper, except much more...elastic.

So now, in addition to the two Gulf Shores condos, 21st Street is on the market, where the others will also be as they become tenant-less, and maybe (Lord willing, and no risen creeks nor hurricanes) someday soon we'll be out of the landlord business altogether!!!!!!!!

What a day of rejoicing that will be...

Easily Amused

I know I'm easily amused, but I have found the coolest website!!

Try it: Motivator

I made others...wanna see?!?

Young whippersnappers...

I'm getting old.

This week, I've been helping my new aide, Jimmie Nash, with her first grade lunch duty in the Aikin cafeteria. Frankly, I have never cared much for first graders - as a group - because collectively, they are harder to herd than cats, and much less friendly. Getting a group of first graders to all end up in the same location? It's kind of like kicking an ant hill, then trying to get the ants to all go back into that one little hole.

I tremendously admire teachers who do it successfully, because I know there's no way on God's green earth that I could.

But the reason I say I'm getting old? Watching these first graders in the lunchroom, I'm just amazed at the attitudes already on display. I saw so many kids this week, only five or six years old, already coming into school with this unattractive little swagger, a little toss of their head, purse of their lips, or roll of their eyes when an adult spoke to them that shouts to the world, "You aren't the boss of me! You can't tell me what to do!!" And it hurts my heart to see that unwillingness ALREADY to act cooperatively or respectfully or unselfishly.

I had the cutest little kid sass me - a teacher he had never seen before - when I told him to stop hitting - hard - the kid in line in front of him. And I mean sass me in a way that if it had been a five year old Amanda or James, I'd have yanked them out of there so fast on their way to a spanking that their feet would have barely touched the ground.

But you know what? At five years old, Amanda and James already knew better than to pull that kind of crap with ANY adult.

And I guess that's what hurts my heart the most...that these kids show by their actions that they don't have adults in their lives who love them enough to teach them how to act.

One Family's Junk...

We're gearing up for our sorta-annual garage sale. It's been a couple of years, probably, since we've had one, and this one's sure to be a Big One. We've always been good at accumulating...stuff...and I think we're about to get to a place where we're ready to start letting said stuff go.

I find myself looking at things now in one of three ways: Is it something one of the kids might want someday (i.e., a family treasure kind of thing)? or: Is it something we want to take with us into our retirement? or: Is it something we just need for everyday life or conducting business? If it doesn't fall into one of those categories, it's going to the garage. Most of it, anyway. There are still a few things that I'm just not ready to give up yet, but I will be. One of these days.

We're not going to get its total worth, most likely, for some of it - the Fiesta, the Depression glass, that kind of stuff - but it's not doing anything for us just sitting in a cabinet, either, so it's going. Bargains will be found by some lucky shoppers.

Amanda's selling some stuff, and she's throwing some stuff away. I told her that she'll probably do more of that every time she comes home from now on. Stuff she wanted to hang on to after high school will come to mean less to her the more she is away from it. Naturally. She's moving toward a new life, as she should be.

James is also selling some stuff, but his is with a purpose: he wants new stuff. He's buying new furniture with the money he makes. He painted his room (with a lot of help from his sister) and did a great job picking out the colors and all. I told him he should be the next generation's Ty Pennington - cute, handy and soft-hearted.

Sale's coming up Saturday, July 22nd. Get here early, before all the good stuff's gone!!

Death By Plastic

My friend Tony Lewis, who is the father of the cutest child born in 2004, has created a new blog, "Death By Plastic."

He's using this blog to discuss the perils of today's easy-credit, instant gratification society, in an easy to read and follow format. Speaking as one who has fought plenty of credit battles in her life, and who (with the help of some common sense, a good marriage, and a little bit of Paxil there for a while) has emerged on the other side sane, whole, and debt-free, let me encourage you to read what Tony has to say and take it to heart.

Debt and credit are probably among the most important issues facing American society today.

Well, sure, there's the war, and drugs, and environmental decay,and a few other issues...but economically speaking, personal debt affects every single citizen every single day. I see this in so many ways.

Fortunately, my friends are the smart ones who know how to act with credit. I don't think any of my really good friends are careless with credit. Hopefully, they've listened to enough of my cautionary tales to make a difference in what they do. But there are so many others...

People I see who live above their means, then apply for yet another credit card to try to keep the whole house of cards standing, to hold on the SUV, or the country club membership, or the HOUSE, for another month. The ones who are regulars at the check-cashing stores, or the payday loan companies, or the pawn shops to try to hold it all together. The ones who go out of town to file bankruptcy so it doesn't show up on the Lamar County Court Recorder.

We check credit on everyone who wants to live in one of our rent houses. What an eye-opener. MUCH of what we see is medical debt...but my feelings on health care in America are for another post. But we also see plenty of collections or judgements from places like Friedman's Jewelers...Household Finance...various auto financers...Sears...JC Penney...shoot, if Dollar General had a private credit card, we'd probably see collections from them too. We don't disqualify someone simply because of bad credit, but we do look at time since their more recent problems, how extensive the problems are, and things like that, before we trust them with one of our houses.

And when someone applies for a Quiznos franchise, their credit is checked. If their FICO score is below 670, they aren't qualified. That means, if they really want a franchise, there will be some pretty substantial hoops through which they must jump. They could - and in many cases, do - have a half million dollars in the bank, but if their credit score is low, we make 'em prove how much they want to work with us. It is always surprising to see the number of people who meet all the other financial qualifications - $250,000 net worth, $70,000 cash to invest - and yet their FICO score is in the weeds.

And if they've ever declared bankruptcy? Forget it. They will not be awarded a Quiznos franchise.

Donald Trump? Not qualified, sorry.

I honestly believe that consumer finance ought to be a required course in every high school in the United States. No kid should graduate from high school without knowing how to create a useable budget, keep a check register, balance a checkbook, how and when to apply for credit, and then...how to use that credit wisely.

I think that's one of the most valuable tools we can pass on to our children.

The DaVinci...Conundrum

We went to see The DaVinci Code while we were in Gulf Shores. I didn't like it quite so much as I liked the book, but I did enjoy it. Tom Hanks needs a new hairstylist.

What I don't understand is this: what's all the fuss about?!?

In the first place, it's a novel. I guess one might categorize it as an historical novel, based on things that either happened, or might have happened, or were rumored to have happened. But still and all, it's a novel.

But if there were truth to it...why would that necessarily be so bad?

If Jesus and Mary Magdalene HAD been married, and if they HAD had children together, what, exactly, would that change? I don't understand all the controversy, all the...drama. Why would this be a secret that would change the world?

I'm sure I'm just so religiously unsophisticated that I'm not seeing the main picture here, but if we accept that Jesus was both human AND divine, how would his being married or fathering children compromise his divinity? How could He be more human and less divine, if we already accept that He was both?

If His mission was indeed to live among us as a human, to experience all the joy and heartache, delight and frustration that comes with being human, then it seems to me to be a logical extension that He did, in fact, fall in love...as a human might, marry...as a human might, father a child...as a human might.

To me, it makes it all the more poignant and breath-taking that He might have had what I, at least, consider to be a happy and fulfilling life - companionship, children, love - and yet, He was willing to give it all up. To sacrifice Himself on our behalf. To leave behind all the happiness His human life contained, for all of us to be able to achieve eternal life.

Wow.

Now if someone were to posit that Jesus didn't actually die on the cross and wasn't resurrected, well...THAT I'd have a problem with, because that WOULD, in fact, change everything. But if Jesus, the One who said "suffer the little children to come unto me" was actually a Daddy, that makes not a whit of difference to me.

Sand Between My Toes

We just got back from a few days in Gulf Shores. Perfect weather - not too hot, nice and cool in the mornings, no rain.

Rumors abounded that there were sharks in the water, but we never saw any.

We went to the zoo this time - never been there before this trip. This is the Alabama Gulf Coast Zoo. What fun!

If you've been watching "The Little Zoo That Could" on Animal Planet, then you already know Patti Hall, and Cyndi Johnson, and all the folks who evacuated all 300+ animals...THREE times in the past year to protect them from hurricanes. Their story is amazing, and their zoo is terrific!

They are hand-raising three Bengal tiger cubs this summer, and the cubs come out to play twice a day. These kittens are just too cute. Patti and Cyndi take them home every night to bottle-feed. The cubs are on loan from a private breeding facility, and they'll be in Gulf Shores until the end of August.

It is worth a trip to Alabama just to see them!

And, plus...there's the beach...

Son of a Son of a Son...

One of these days, I'm certain that James will email me the pictures he took at the AWESOME Jimmy Buffett concert, and I'll share them, and all the details...

"Ding Dong, Avon calling!"...no, wait, that's the wrong company!!!

So...I'm a Tupperware Lady now. Hold your snarky comments, please. This is NOT the Tupperware of old. Nay, nay, let me assure you that there is some cool stuff in Today's Tupperware!!

Check out my own personal website. Click the logo above, or visit http//www.mytupperware.com/freed . You can place online orders or schedule an online Tupperware party. At online parties, you won't have to do any of the silly little icebreaker thingys.

Or call me and I'll come to your house and throw a party! We'll Tup Tup Tup the day away...

At least (s)he got to The Promised Land

Jethro the Black Goldfish was pronounced dead today at 12:48 p.m. CST. Cause of death is undetermined, but is not believed to have been related to the ridiculously unseasonable snow shower earlier in the week. Place of death was the lovely new pond at Stately Reed Manor.

(S)he had just recently relocated there from her/his previous residence in the five-gallon Homer bucket (right) in the garage, to which (s)he was relocated after the Pond Formerly Known as Lovely was destroyed in a fit of remodeling fever.

(S)he is survived by her/his good friend (who may also have been her/his mother/father (or sister/brother)) Homer, as well as a host of new friends, the 17 recently relocated Brannan's Bass Shop evacuees.

When asked if (s)he would miss Jethro, Homer flipped her/his fin, and dove to the bottom of the pond.

We are SO there....